Angelina Jolie walks into the room holding an envelope like it’s a dramatic movie prop.
Angelina:
“Happy birthday, Joey.”
Joey:
“Thanks… why do you look like you’re about to give a speech at the Oscars?”
Angelina (opening the letter):
“Because this is important. Congratulations. You’ve been drafted.”
Joey:
“Drafted? Drafted where?”
Angelina:
“To the war with Iran.”
Joey:
“What?! I don’t want to go to war! I don’t want to fight Iran for Israel!”
Angelina slowly lowers the letter and stares at him with theatrical seriousness.
Angelina:
“That’s anti-Semitic, son.”
Joey blinks in disbelief.
Joey:
“I just said I don’t want to go to war!”
Angelina straightens her posture like a drill sergeant.
Angelina (pointing toward the door):
“Now… forward march!”
Joey sighs, looking back at the untouched birthday cake.
Joey:
“Worst birthday ever…” 🎂